Facebook | Pinterest | Instagram Of course he had to pull something like this on day one. I’m tempted to feel bad for the teachers who had to deal with turtles running rampant, but then I remember that if Edison had been home, instead of turtles, it would have been bidet water shooting across my living room, or going to the ER for stitches after he jumped off the trampoline “onto a tree.” And I would have been the one dealing with it. I feel like after 4 straight years of this mayhem, someone else can handle him (and the resultant turtle hunting) for a few hours a week. Maybe next time they should just put HIM in the turtle cage instead, seems easier. (I asked Edison this week if he remembered getting stitches a few months ago. He didn’t at first. I said, “Remember, we went to the hospital?” His face lights up, he pumps his fists in the air, and says, “Oh yeah, I remember when I could watch shows for hours!!” NOOOO how does he only have positive memories of that??) I have a very simple recipe that I’ve been making for years and years but have never felt like it was important enough to document. It’s hardly a recipe, honestly. But I am realizing more lately that the simplest of recipes can be ruined if you don’t understand the RULES. And I have some pretty strict rules about guac. Perfectly ripe avocados should be soft when you use them. You will know they are ready if you can use one finger to easily remove this little knobbly piece (a technical term) from the end here. If it won’t budge, your avocado is probably too hard to be opened up right now. If you remove the knobby guy and it’s green on the inside, it’s perfectly ripe. If it’s dark brown, your avocado is over ripe. Sometimes this works out, but sometimes my guacamole cravings come in hard and fast, before the poor avocados have time to ripen, and after we’ve greedily eaten last weeks. In that case, you can put avocados in a sealed brown paper bag to speed up the ripening process. Adding a banana to the bag really moves things along! For some reason it’s become trendy to use a giant chef’s knife to chop soft avocados, and to chop them while holding them in your hand. Don’t be that guy.
Cilantro, chopped tiny tiny. Start with 2-4 tablespoons Minced white or red onion, start with 1-3 tablespoons. You can even use a cheese grater to shred it, I love my onion tiny in guac. Jalapeño, seeded and diced, start with just one and move up from there. Tomatoes, ugh, fine. Slice them open and scrape all the seeds out. Then dice the rest and add it in.
If you are wondering what kind of guacamole is authentic in Mexico, the answer is all of the above. My husband Eric lived in Tijuana for 2 years serving a mission for our church, and he was served every possible guacamole variation you could think of in Mexican homes. (Mexico is not a guacamole discriminator BUT I AM, GET THOSE TOMATOES OUT. 😝) Then juice them. I don’t usually bust out my electric juicer for just 2 limes, but my normal hand reamer was in the dirty dishwasher and that’s how deep my laziness goes. I was willing to bust out an entire appliance in order to avoid 25 seconds of dish washing. The plot thickens. My friend Sarah from Snixy Kitchen has started helping me edit my photos. Yesterday she was in the middle of editing these guac photos and sent me this: In the previous photo, she edited out the fact that my citrus appliance is in serious need of a wipe down. But you guys know the real me 😂 I’m sorry that I am the way I am, okay? Okay sorry back to the guacamole. This is a simple recipe with only 3 main ingredients, so I wanted to be really specific on amounts. You don’t have to bust out the scale, but just fyi: 4 large avocados weigh about 1.5 pounds. Use your BUTTER KNIFE to slice open your avocados, and your fingers or a spoon to get the pits out. Then scoop it onto the plate where you zested the limes. Mashing avocados (and bananas for Banana Bread!) in a bowl is super annoying in my opinion. I can’t smash properly without hitting the edge of the bowl. The leverage situation!! It’s a disaster people!! So I always prefer to mash with a fork on a plate, then transfer to a bowl. Yes, now I have two dishes to wash, but the sanity I save is worth it. Again, you don’t have to measure your lime juice, but I was trying to be specific for you guys. I like somewhere between 2-3 tablespoons for 4 large avocados (this is because I also used lime zest. Use more juice if you didn’t zest.) Add some salt, I like about 3/4 teaspoon. You don’t need a ton, especially if you are eating with salty chips. Add the seasonings if you’re using them, then use a spatula to stir it all together and transfer to a serving bowl. Voila!
A big ol’ bowl of chips (my preferred brand is Juanitas) and some amazing salsa – I like this 5 Minute Restaurant Style Salsa or fresh Pico de Gallo For a bangin apps and drinks situation, serve guac with these Virgin Pina Coladas! Ho boy. Serve it alongside some Queso, or even some copycat Chili’s Queso Dip Best Chicken Tacos Recipe (Stovetop or Crockpot) » these are taqueria style and would be SO GOOD with a hefty serving of guacamole. Hefty I say!! Ultimate Chili Nachos with Queso and Guacamole » so perfect for game day or for dinner The Best Chili Recipe Ever! (Slow Cooker) » Guac is such a good chili topper! Seriously the Best Taco Salad » maybe should have been named Serious Taco Salad, cause we’re not messing around here. It’s the best! Traditional Carne Guisada Tacos » if you’ve never had traditional Tejano food, you haven’t liiiiived Pozole Rojo like Abuela’s » I usually add avocado slices, but I think guac would absolutely kill in this soup! The Best Chicken Quesadillas from Mel’s Kitchen Cafe
To avoid the brown layer, you want to prevent as much exposure to air as possible. Add your leftover guacamole to an airtight container, and smooth the top with the back of a spoon so it’s as even as possible. Squeeze some lime juice (or lemon juice is fine) over the top. If you are out of limes, you can even use water! It creates an excellent barrier between the guac and the air. Press some plastic wrap directly on top of the now-wet guacamole. Then put your lid on top of the plastic. Keep it in the fridge, and definitely use it up quickly. It should last two, maybe three days but I generally like to eat it as soon possible. Just keep in mind that we can’t prevent ALL air from reaching the avocado and you will most likely see some amount of browning. Even store bought guac, with all those preservatives, starts to brown over time. It’s guacamole now or forever hold your peace! If you added anything chunky (tomatoes, onions, etc) I do NOT recommend freezing. The thawing process will cause these bits to become soggy, making a big watery mess of your guac that no one will enjoy. Your best bet is to eat it at every meal until it’s gone!
Homemade Chipotle Sauce Recipe » perfect on everything from a taco to a BLT Mexican Street Corn Dip » I could literally eat this whole thing. Carol’s Legendary 7 Layer Dip » Carol is the QUEEEEN How to make Garlic Aioli (Classic and Cheater Versions) » lemony garlicky heaven to put on sandwiches or dip fries into Best Buttermilk Ranch Dressing Recipe » Ranch is for way more than salads – use it as a dip for veggies, pizza, egg rolls, and more Best Cheese Dipping Sauce Ever (Shake Shack Copycat) » until I made this sauce, I didn’t know just how many things I would be willing to smother in cheese Tzatziki Sauce (with Toasted Za’atar Pita: Easy Appetizer!) » simple, fresh, healthy, and TASTY Extra Cheesy Spinach Artichoke Dip (Hot or Cold!) » a fan favorite since the 50s for a reason Bacon Blue Cheese Dip » a perfect tangy, salty combo that goes with everything Pimiento Cheese Dip » I’d like to thank the South for this perfect mayo, cheese, and pepper dip!
