I was flipping through radio stations in the car the other day, and that “Fast Car” song that Luke Combs covered came on. Edison, who is 3, lit up and said Oh, I like this song! After a minute he said, “This song is good, but I like the original one better.” Oh you guys, the PRIDE!! Tracy Chapman forever. Who loves that old song? So classic. I may be a hot mess mom, but at least I’ve got one thing right: my kids are learning good music. They’re learning all about balanced diets, too. Edison came home from a friend’s house yesterday, and I asked what he ate for lunch. “I had Pirate’s Booty! It’s good for your booty.” Ha! Wouldn’t that be nice! If puffy cheese snacks are good for your booty, imagine what some REAL cheese is going to do for you. Our figures are never going to be better after eating all this charcuterie! I definitely prefer to boost my booty with straight up cheese. Does a body good, right? Or something?? 😂 Our Thanksgiving spread last week. He’s even licking his lips, haha!! They make stunning centerpieces, and are often the star of the show. I just put one together for Thanksgiving last week, and at the end of the day my dad said to me, “All the food was so good Karen…but my favorite part of the whole day was the charcuterie board. I love all that stuff.” I’m telling you, if you want to win friends and influence people, buy them cheese and crackers. Prepping a board at my sister Nikki’s house a few years ago, where I labeled what ingredient went in each dish, to save myself time putting it together before the event. (That’s honeycomb right in the middle, a delicious addition and fun conversation starter.) Americans tend to feel a little insecure about charcuterie because most of us are not educated about fancy meats and cheeses. But I promise, you can do this. I will show you everything you need to know! I will tell you my big secret: as long as you have a plan before you shop, and follow a few simple guidelines, you will find out just how incredibly easy charcuterie boards are to put together. Here’s a board from a few years ago that was decimated before I could even get started on making it pretty. THESE KIDS!! Look, one of them even opened a granola bar and left it. How dare they. What I ended up doing for a very long time was going in with no plan, and waaay over buying. I’d walk out of the store with way more cheese than I needed for my party. And often I bought visually, meaning I bought the cheeses that were “cute”: adorable round rinds that look like they came fresh from a French dairy farm. There is nothing wrong with cute cheese, but often that meant I was buying 4 different kinds of Triple Cream cheese and nothing else. All of these cheeses are adorable and look like they belong on a board right? I mean come on, look at that red checkered paper and wooden box. The problem is that they all serve the same purpose: all these cheeses are mild and soft. They serve as a buttery, fatty compliment to whatever you pair it with. This is DELICIOUS, but you only need one like this on your board.
You need a variety of types of cheese: at least 1 soft, 1 hard, 1 tangy. Variety of cheese, in my opinion, is more important than anything else. I tell people this whenever they start gushing about a board I’ve created: the main thing that’s impressive about a charcuterie board is that there is SO MUCH FOOD. It doesn’t matter what the food is, if you keep piling it on and adding MORE, it’s going to look very colorful and impressive. My goal is to cover every part of the board so you can’t see the wood anymore. But guys, that’s just my style! It doesn’t have to be that way. There are plenty of amazing boards that are more minimal. But if you have a big party, watch as people’s eyes pop out of their heads when they see the giant mound of food you have on your board. It’s so fun! Variety is everything when it comes to making your board feel special. Choose what you like. Don’t buy ANYTHING if you don’t think your guests will eat it. This trumps every other “rule” for charcuteries.
This was the first board I ever tried to build, for a Christmas party back in…2018? I got SO confused and befuddled at the store and ended up buying way too much. And SO much meat leftover! I know, no meat technically makes it a “cheese board” and not charcuterie, but go ahead and explain this to your guests and watch as their eyes roll into the back of their head from boredom over this technicality. Not everyone feels meat is optional, though. One time a couple years ago my sister-in-law realized I didn’t have any cold cuts for the board and she actually went off to the store to get some. I thought it was so funny! Know your audience I guess! But most of all, choose what YOU like. Also, people will eat more meat if your charcuterie is serving as a light meal rather than as an appetizer to a main course. On that note: having even just one homemade item makes your board really special. It’s ALWAYS the star of the board. Here are some of my favorites to serve with a charcuterie board:
Pesto (recipe in notes) Onion dip. Pimiento dip. Whipped ricotta. Whipped Feta. Cranberry Jalapeno Dip. Strawberry Jalapeno Jam dumped over a block of cream cheese. Chimichurri (pesto’s cheaper cousin). Garlic Aioli. Horseradish Sauce. (this goes best with meat) Balsamic Reduction. Olive Oil and Balsamic Bread Dip. Cinnamon Honey Butter. Lemon Curd.
Provide a few different types of crackers and bread. Make them bite size so people don’t have to use plates. (Unless you want them to.) Make sure to choose a variety of ingredients based on texture: crispy, soft, chewy. Have something spicy and something sweet Serve cheese room temperature; it’s more flavorful than cold cheese. Get it out of the fridge about a half hour before serving.
My Christmas Eve board from a few years ago, with the Rye bread in a separate bowl. (The pink stuff in the bowl is Liver Pate, a very classic Swedish spread that Eric’s family always makes for their Christmas Eve dinner with Rye bread and Swedish Meatballs. The Rye bread is going up on the blog later in December, I’ve been meaning to post it for YEARS! Do you want the pate recipe? It’s delicious. Those are Butter Pecan Cookies on the top left.)
To be honest though, these days I often don’t put the bread and crackers on the board itself. I usually have baskets and bowls of crackers nearby. I know, I know, this is not what Instagram says to do, but soggy crackers are annoying! Sometimes I will lay out an entire second board that ONLY has breads and crackers on it, arranging them nicely, to keep the dry dippers separate from the charcuterie board.
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Here is a very basic guide for how-much-cheese-to-buy, calculated as an APPETIZER, not dinner:
Cheese per person for a board serving 3-5 people
3 to 4 ounces hard cheese (total for the board) 3 to 4 ounces soft cheese (total for the board) 3 to 4 ounces tangy cheese (total for the board)
Cheese per person for a board serving 6-8 people
5 to 6 ounces hard cheese (total for the board) 5 to 6 ounces soft cheese (total for the board) 5 to 6 ounces tangy cheese (total for the board)
Cheese per person for a board serving 10-15 people
10+ ounces hard cheese (total for the board) 10+ ounces soft cheese (total for the board) 10+ ounces tangy cheese (total for the board)
Hard / firm cheese ideas
When you cut into a very hard cheese, it will crumble like this:
If you look closely at this Pecorino Toscano cheese, you can see the white crystals (called Tyrosine crystals) that form as cheese ages. They are crunchy and SO flavorful. If you see any crystals like this, you know you are holding a very flavorful, hard, aged cheese.
Firm/semi-soft cheese is not as squishy and squeezable and spreadable as a soft cheese (think brie), but not as crumbly as a very hard cheese (think Parmesan). It’s somewhere in the middle.
Sometimes the best way to know what type of cheese you’re thinking about buying is just to squeeze it. Does it feel as hard as Parmigiano? It’s probably hard cheese. Does it feel soft like goat cheese? It’s a soft cheese by golly! Does it feel like your average cheddar cheese that you put on your sandwich yesterday? Then it’s “firm” or semi-soft.
Ricotta, cottage cheese, and cream cheese are all GREAT options to include if your audience might be a little nervous about eating soft cheese. (Kids, for example. And wimpy adults.) They are mild and accessible and still great for spreading on crackers. Fancy them up by sprinkling with salt and pepper or beating and then drizzling with olive oil.
Stinky cheese examples include Blue cheese, gorgonzola, dunbarton blue, marbled blue jack, goat cheese. Any cheese that has blue marbling in it goes in this category. I put goat cheese in this category (even though it is soft enough to be spreadable) because I feel like it serves the same purpose as a blue cheese: it’s tangy and very potent.
thinly sliced Pastrami or sliced black forest ham from the deli Genoa salami or peppered salami Soppressata (is similar to salami) Calabrese Salami (spicy) Proscuitto Chorizo Mortadella any type of cured sausage
If you go to a nice store, often they will have meats packaged together, chosen specifically to go on a charcuterie. I find it so much easier to buy one or two of these prepackaged ones! That way you know you are getting a good variety, instead of accidentally buying 3 kinds of meats that all taste very similar. Exact instructions and amounts for these are in the recipe card below, but please remember this is about creating a board that YOU love, or that will really fit the theme or group you’re aiming for. Use these as a guideline and switch them up to meet your needs! Make the pesto, if that’s your savory sauce of choice. I didn’t snap any pictures of this, but it’s so easy. Just dump all the ingredients in the food processor, whirl it up, and bam, pesto in 5 minutes. The recipe is in the notes at the bottom of the recipe card. Now it’s time to start putting it all together! Place your cheeses on an 18-inch board. If you are planning to pre-slice it for your guests, do it now while you have space on the board. It’s totally okay to leave the cheese whole and allow guests to slice. Next step: add your “anchor” bowls. Today we are using one jar of spicy fig jam, one bowl of pesto, and one bowl of marinated olives: Don’t forget to add in spoons for these items. Next up: the meat. Don’t stress about arranging it in the exact right spot. Just throw it on there wherever you think it looks good, and you can shuffle it around as you add more food. Folding meat: It’s trendy right now to get super fancy with the meat folding. I’ve never been much into this, but don’t let that stop you from using your salami to make paper-crane origami level creations. Above you can see how I rolled my pastrami, and here is a simple example of how to fold salami so it looks flower-y. See? simple. Still looks great. Don’t stress yourself out! Next up: If you choose to add bread and crackers to the board itself (as is traditional) add them in now, along with fruits and veggies. I love to include a variety of crackers. I LOVE those Delallo Sesame crackers on the bottom left there. And it’s always fun to include something fancy like the Fig and Olive Crisps: Sometimes I like to keep my bread and crackers separate, in their own bowls or on plates. That way they don’t get soggy! Next up, we are adding in fruits, veggies, and other fillers like nuts. I love these teeny tiny 1-ounce jars of honey and jam you can find in a charcuterie display of the deli. It’s a great way to add variety without going overboard on amounts: I always have honey available on my boards, but to my own downfall because hello, I have 4 kids. My 7-year-old comes in and sees bread and honey and goes to town. Every time we have a charcuterie board I end up with honey all over my counters and in her hair. Ha! I love honey on my cheese too much to leave it out, but fair warning if you have any kids/heathens you’re feeding. And voila! Here she is! Remember, at this point, you can keep adding more of all the same things you already have until the board is full and overflowing. A board that is piled high is SO much fun! (if that’s your style ;) One of my favorite things to do when making a board is ask guests what their favorite combo from the board is! Sometimes people come up with things I wouldn’t have thought of. This is Manchego, Fig-Olive cracker, spicy Coppa, and fig jam. But it’s perfect to serve as an appetizer before a large holiday meal, at any kind of party. They are also fun at bridal or baby showers, or even a game night. I mentioned above that one of my favorite things to do is have at least ONE homemade item on my board. Here are some other ideas:
Quick and Easy French Bread Recipe » perfect to make the day before and slice thinly and bake to serve as crostini! Southern Pecan Cheese Wafers » homemade toasty cheese crackers. Perfect little one bite treats! my mom made these last week for Thanksgiving. How to make Balsamic Vinegar Reduction » can you imagine drizzling some of this over cheese on a cracker? YUM How to Make Easy Chimichurri Sauce » No cooking, and pairs SO WELL with all those cured meats Chunky Chex Mix Muddy Buddies Recipe » chocolate peanut butter treats that would be amazing to spread out in little bits around your board, if you’re going in a sweet direction. 10 Minute Caramel Popcorn in the Microwave » another awesome (and SUPER easy) thing to add to a fun charcuterie! The Easiest Sugared Cranberries » perfect addition to any boards you make during the holidays! So sparkly and festive! Quick Pickled Vegetables from Feasting at Home Pickled Onions from Love and Lemon. (My brother Eric told me that no charcuterie is complete for him without pickled onions. SO good with cheese.)
If you’ve made the charcuterie directly on parchment/butcher paper on a buffet table, you can leave it out and just cover anything that doesn’t need to be refrigerated. Put the cheeses and meats in their original containers or tupperware until ready to eat, then add back to the board later. If you don’t plan on serving any of the leftovers together, just repackage each item in its original container or a new one if need be. Refrigerate cheese, meat, jelly, or veggie leftovers. Bread and crackers can stay in the pantry. Follow the best-by date on the package for how long each item will last. One thing to note. Sometimes, a charcuterie board can get messy, especially depending on the people you’re serving (ahem, like if any children will have access to it). Take a moment to judge your board when it’s all said and done. There may be some items that just make more sense to throw away if they were dripped on or picked at. Just use your discretion! You can keep it simple by packaging 1-2 types of cheese (the whole thing, unopened, so they can eat it when they want), a selection of meat, and produce. Make sure to include at least one sauce or spread of some kind (I love the little mini honeys and jams they sell in the deli section.) And include an unopened box of crackers or baguette slices.
Extra Cheesy Spinach Artichoke Dip (Hot or Cold!) » Smooth, creamy, and extra-cheesy Caprese Salad Skewers Appetizer » Perfect year round! Summer tomatoes and basil, but also red and green for Christmas! Bacon Wrapped Pineapple with Honey Chipotle Glaze » You can’t go wrong with bacon and pineapple, I mean really. Smokey Almond Cream Cheese Endive Bites » A great addition to any board. These are low carb! French Onion Dip from Belly Full
