I get complete nonsense reminders on my phone all the time. It’ll be 3pm (or 3am!) and my phone will pop up with random phrases like, “Call Sav,” “Plan blanc,” “Kitchen attach,” or simply, “Foot.” These are of course things that I have commanded Siri to remind me about and she completely botched. The problem is that I’ll say something into my phone, realize immediately that my phone recorded it wrong, and then think to myself, Oh, I’ll totally remember what “Plan Blanc” means 2 weeks from now....

I have finally got my rear in gear, people. No, that does not mean I have finally implemented an exercise regime. I’m pretty sure doctors no longer tell you to wait 6 weeks after childbirth to start exercising. It’s “when your body is ready.” But they change their minds about baby and pregnancy stuff all the time anyway, so I’m sticking with my 6 weeks of guilt-free couch potatoeing. But back to my in-gear rear....